Quoting the words of my brat of a sister, she revealed that my dad told her this a couple of days ago, "wo kan ni yi ding bi jiejie gao." which can be loosely translated as "im sure u'll be taller than your sister is..." Now what is THAT supposed to mean?!! And how many times must i say this, but i ain't short, im P.E.T.I.T.E!!
*jy fumes. while bratty sis laughs her head off*
Im now sitting in a computer lab in S15 for a remedial to teach slow-pokes like me how to create a webpage; and who probably managed to create one in their respective tutorials by sheer luck. Oh, but thankfully, i've got a monkey by my side to entertain me. *and wanling waves gleefully*
To tell the truth, the lab's freezing my ass off and im starting to find my monkey freaking irritating. And im suuuuper hungry to boot.
And i'm essentially done with the tasks the lecturer got us to do, that's why im getting really restless. Or else why would i wanna post such a dumb thing here?! hahaha!
Visited the skin doctor after soci lect yday, coz my skin's still looking like shit after 2 mths. And i almost had a heart attack when the receptionist declared the cost of my medication. Which was an obscene sum of money considering my financial limits. Mum doesnt subsidise my skin visits, (and in fact, she's been borrowing money frm me to pay the centre's rental fees coz her students havent paid up yet.)
Now, for all my friends out there reading this, if u still have a heart, pls dont come asking me how much i paid. Coz u'll never know when i might start to break down n cry in heartache. Yes, heartache is the word of the day coz i earned every single cent of the money that i used to pay the bloodsucking doc. But i admit that the creams, gel and crap are working lah. I guess i just need to be a 'lil more patient with my skin.
Hope my face cleans up before my 21st birthday. No...make it earlier than that. Before i start to perform for xmas gigs. Coz i still want to perform with a pretty face in public!
it's a happy day today.
Dr Why ended stats lect under one hour. YEAH! and so it allowed me to spend some quality time with myself, savouring my fav chicken patty from the waffle stall. its damned expensive for that tiny piece of chicken but heck, its good.
And maybe coz i felt good after my food, Reso pract turned out great today. I didnt screw up this time!=D heheh...and i even managed to lead warm-ups, which i havent done since CGSS choir days. *major boost of self-esteem*
shall sleep once im done printing my soci notes on gender n sexuality. Hope i wont shiver to death later in that freezer i call LT 7A. Now i know why engin students have are known to be rigid and inflexible. Coz their brains are all frozen n solidified wad!
shit happens when u dont focus. and when i say shit, it refers to things like applying hair conditioner on ur body instead of your hair, taking a 15min nap (which eventually lasted 2hrs coz u kept snoozing) in the middle of your readings when u've barely started; and last but not least, anyhow choosing a grp leader for ur proj just to find out a couple of days later that she's a domineering fella. OH SHIT. here's OOPS n Suhui doing their 'thang! Just to clarify: no, a fire didnt break out during the concert. 'Smoke-cappella' i.e. singing with smoke, was the theme for this yr's event. Equivox and Shuying. Confident singing+ entertaining stage choreo= successful performance And there's VnH doing a groovy BeeGees no. (Sorry for the bad mistake, but the song was in fact by Earth wind and fire, called September. *lao kui* haha Davina, thanks for the correction!) Very 70s. I like. Juz B!!! This was taken when they were still doing their last min warm-ups and pract before the show started. We don't usually catch these kinda things fr celebrities, do we? Their cover of Lee Hom's Kiss Goodbye still manages to make me feel sad, tho it's been sung at, like, every one of their shows. Finally, all the Reso ppl who were there on Sat=)
Well, at the very least I just hope i wont wake up in the morning with forests of body hair on my arms and chest. That's very, very scary if u ask me.
but thankfully, yday and yday's yday were gd. Went for Acafest and saw my friends in action. Not that they were flawless, but they did a wonderful job all the same! Whatever mistakes they made, they sure recovered fast. And im sure this is the best thing u can ever ask for from any performer:) I've got to mention that Equivox's pieces were very inspiring tho. Got so much action, yet the singing was in excellent ctrl. VnH...ha..need i say more? I've really got lots to learn from them. and oh, Juz B performed too! 
...and so, the panda keeps running, running, and running, running as fast as her short stubby legs could carry her.
*pant pant*
FOOD! OH GLORIOUS FOOD!
I don't know exactly when the pig-out bug hit, but i suddenly found myself craving for Munchies' calamari rings during my computing tutorial. It didnt help that it was a chore...what with complicated webpage-uploading processes and a substitute tutor with thick foreign accent that my puny brain refused to register. It simply tuned out and focused...on the heavenly image of the tray of calamari rings with its yummy tomato sauce - and my tummy generated a low-frequency growl in response.
me satisfied my craving soon after, but it apparently wasn't enough. So being the pig that i have now become, i happily ordered a warm chocolate fudge cake with vanilla ice-cream after my calamari...and shared it with pear. Coz i truly believe that good friends not only share secrets, they share calories too=D (haha, so sorry pear! pretend u never read this k?lol)
And as an afterthought, maybe there really isnt any reason why i shld try so hard to keep myself slim afterall. And perhaps it wasn't necessary for my chummy-tummy to have to keep halving itself either. Who am i trying to impress by putting in all that effort? Bulging tummy then bulging tummy lah...and even if this means that the chances of me dying an 80-yr-old spinster are now much higher, so be it. im throwing caution to the wind already.
but still...can anyone try to talk me out of this depressing mentality before it becomes a permanent reality? hahah i need second opinions!
Today, i've an important achievement to announce. For the first time since the beginning of the new semester, I WENT TO BED BEFORE 12AM! C'mon, somebahdey clap pls!! *cues*
In actual fact, i would have slept at 10 if it wasnt for the show Jin San Shun on Channel U. That female lead's my heroine! Haven't had a tv character with whom i cld empathise with for a long, long time.
And so after the show, i concussed at 1130pm yesterday (without brushing my teeth heehee...sorry), and woke up very much alive and 'kicking very well' this morning. hahah... I wanna do this again!
I've been feeling pretty much more contented these days i think. I still grumble and get depressed over trivial stuffs, and i still dont get enough sleep, but great comfort lies in the knowledge that i've people who care for me. And the funny thing is, this knowledge doesnt come to u when everything arnd u is all fine n dandy; it is only when u find yourself in deep shit (or maybe even just a smaller degree of shit) that u'll start to see these things. And this kind of concern doesnt even necessarily have to be directly applied to the issue at hand. I realise recently that even nonsensical conversations which make no sense at all can also work wonders in improving ur mood. I guess they kinda act as a distraction from the things that trouble u; but more importantly, they serve to remind you that ur life is more than just that load of bullcrap that u have in your hands.
And after i see that, almost like a miracle, even certain forms of nagging has become quite endearing to me. *winks* I've had friends urging me to get me out of msn so i wld finally go n sleep; and amusingly, i feel loved. haha...And a greater miracle than this? My list of favourite naggers even extends to Mum! I can't exactly explain why, but lately her nagging has become so much more pleasing to the ears now that i see things in a different light. The laksa she bought for me for breakfast tdy when she did her marketing, her telling me not to sleep so late all the time, the chicken essence she forced me to drink before i went to sch, changing my worn-out Buddhist necklace for me as i was fixated to the computer screen...subtle gestures like these probably screamed 'mummy loves u!' all along, but i heard it loud and clear only lately.
And as i was telling a like-minded friend during a train ride home recently, there is a very simple reason why mumsies shld be placed above all others in ur life:
They're the ONLY ones who would feel the heartache and prepare ginseng for u when u cram for exams while others just tell you "Life's like that."
And Im thinking of printing out this post to show my mum shld she decide to explode on me next time. It might just save my life:p And before i end off, i'd want to give special thanks to my group of friends who lightened my load lots in their own little ways in the past few weeks. You know who you are:D
yiming n ian happily carassing each other's head... Will the real homo-momo pls stand up?! Ian now stroking Eugene, who btw looks damned traumatised. Haha the real homo-momo has stood up. finally we have 2 sane ns guys. monkeying arnd:p Poyi, the rose among the...ermm..'act-cute' thorns. "Qing ni gei wo yi dian chi de baah..." 'ehhhh....what pose u all want?! hurry up make up ur mind!" Well done, my men! Seriously, i think Eugene's looking way too satisfied. Our 1st jug of Fighting Cock. haha....stupid name. And this is jy n her annual drinking buddies saying goodbye!
us in front of the fountain
Today has got to be the best Sunday so far in recent months. I met up with a couple of my pri 6 classmates for dinner; po yi, yiming, ian, eugene, reuben, weixiang to be exact. Shall post the photos later tdy when im more sober.
Dinner was hilariously entertaining with po yi, ian n myself providing the 'do-you-remember's. I can't believe it's been 10yrs since i tranferred to CPS in pri 4...all the lovely memory's making me feel nostalgic. But just to share, our favourite topic of the day was Leong Kong Ker, a very lovable character who never failed to be punished EVERY SINGLE DAY by our Chi teacher coz he refused to do his hmk. And for the record, i rmb he resorted to slipping an exercise book into his pants before Chi lessons. That brilliant smart-ass.
Sadly, the guys (all except yiming) had to book in tonight, so the programme had to end abruptly after dinner. But still, poyi n i managed to talk the guys into talking several silly shots before they left, so it wasnt all so bad:) And though im damned sure that poyi, yiming n i decided to go to the arcade after that, it still stumps me as to how we managed to end up at Acid bar. Housepours were going at 1 for 1, so we settled for a jug of Fighting Cock. Ya, im serious abt the name, although i really have no idea how they managed to link that to a simple drink of bourbon n coke. But it was apt, coz talking cock was precisely what we did. Relationships, virginity, blow jobs...i think it was a really no-holds barred affair ( i hope my vocab's right?). The fun ended with all 3 of us 'tahh'-ing our Fighting Cocks and getting home feeling fluffy n wozzy in the head. Thank goodness yiming stays relatively near me and was kind enough to escort me to my blk before gg home. I hereby pronounce them my drinking buddies, without whom i wont drink. (altho i know by saying that i wont be able to drink till when she comes back from UK next June. Good news for my liver.)
Ah yes, talking abt relationships, i really had nothing to say to my friends. Absolute nilch. Coz i never was in any. But to get the crap off my chest, im publicly admitting that i have been stupid enough to like a guy for 2 yrs without him knowing shite. (yes, it's u who 2 yrs ago got tipsy on CHOYA, of all the other much more decent alcoholic drinks out there, managed to cleverly deduce that u cld have been the one who caught my fancy, and still failed to affirm that deduction. Omg...u even concluded it was CHIN YAW!! It's amazing how stoopid u can get, bugger.) And really. For u to not even notice that something's amiss for so long is also a mystery that i can never, ever fathom. God save the idiot.
Im feeling super shuang now that i've said my piece. Super shuang beyond words. And with all that drowsiness, i can sleep smiling now.
It's been a hectic week for me man. Though it's only been the 2nd week since school started, i've already created a backlog of readings for myself. Spent quite abit of time settling round 2 auditions; now that it's finally over, i've got to fix up the remaining bits and pieces for Welcome Tea. I worry for all the things i havent and cannot do until Monday, and i know i wont be able to sleep peacefully until it's finally over at 9pm on Monday.
I cross my fingers, bite my nails and silently pray hard that i haven't missed out anything else impt, and that the programme will run smoothly without any glitches.
To add to my anxiety, Sis didnt do well for her prelims, and i havent even had time to look at her results yet. PSLE's just around the corner. Im really at a loss thinking of how and what i could do for her cuz she doesnt even seem to understand whatever she's in for no matter how i explain. Sometimes I find myself worried sick abt her unmarked assessment books while she's out there in the living room watching tv, and I wonder who's actually the one taking exams. but i can tell she's been avoiding me too, coz she's afraid of me losing my temper. And her fears aren't unfounded. Coz i really do feel like screaming at her for not trying hard enough sometimes.
But i do this only because I fear the day when i'll see her crying in Mum's arms at the school hall and both Dad and Mum look at me with that accusing look in their eyes.
I dont want that day to ever, ever come.